Loneliness of gregarious souls?

Abstract

In the past decade a great amount of publicity was devoted to examining and explaining the phenomenon of postponing long-term partnerships and marriage, and neither public nor academic interest has diminished ever since. According to some this should be an anxious phenomenon, other people condemn it, or try to be rather tolerant; nevertheless, it seems really thought-provoking that many times these opinions develop on the ground of asymmetric information; hence conclusions remain without understanding and contain disguised interconnections. That is why the research accomplished by Agnes Utasi in 2001 and 2002 and the resultant book entitled Sacrificed Relations. The Hungarian Singles is of great significance; this is the first time that research has been accomplished among stakeholders in Hungary and the book introduces the outcomes while structuring them in the theoretical framework, which provokes not merely academic interest but may serve also as thought-provoking reading for the attentive public. Utasi’s research focuses on singles in their thirties living in bigger towns; via case studies and in-depth interviews. She looks into why one fifth of this age group decides for or ends up in a situation where instead of long-time relationships a lifestyle of short-term or without any kind of partnership is characteristic. The author defines group-specific characteristics as follows: young people in their thirties or forties, good education provided; in comparison with the average they are in better situation on the job market and also make more money. The lack of long-range relationships is also typical; they define themselves as ‘independent’ and spend their free time in diverse ways. Among ‘singles’ Utasi creates two basic categories: the first is referred to as ‘quasi-singles’ where long-range relationship without marriage is provided, and ‘singles’ where occasional relations are typical. Before going into the detail of the domestic research, Utasi explains the outcomes of an international survey which sets up typical international tendencies of the matchmaking habits of the 25–35 year-old population (ISSP 2001 quoted by Utasi 2004). Based on this research in the first place Australian, Norwegian, American and Swiss youth seem to postpone formalizing long-range partnerships; this phenomenon is probably in connection with the economic circumstances that are favorable for continuing individual lifestyles. “Partly modernized” values seem to be typical in the ex-socialist countries: the Czech, Russian, Latvian and Hungarian youth wish to get