Experiences of Living Alone: Widows' and Widowers' Perspectives

Abstract

This paper compares how older widows and widowers experience living alone. The data come from two in-depth interview studies of widows aged over 50 and widowers aged over 57 respectively. Living alone presents differing challenges for both men and women, as does the symbolic meaning of overcoming those challenges. Widows need to overcome their fear of living alone and to master household work that their husbands had previously undertaken. They learn to enjoy living alone and derive a sense of competence from learning new, traditionally masculine, tasks. Widowers characterize their houses as cold places and use terms such as ‘cavern’ and ‘cave’ to describe how they feel. They have a great need to be out of their houses for much of the day to avoid ‘sitting and dwelling’, and they minimize their skills at traditionally feminine household chores such as cooking and cleaning.