Abstract
My own middle school years remain vivid in my memory. I was excluded, and I manipulated the exclusion of others. I could be mean, yet, in turn, I was deeply hurt by others. If my and I did speak to an adult about these problems, we heard such cliches as: There are plenty of girls who would love to be your friends or Can't you just try to be nice to each other or my all time favorite, Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me. Words break your heart and scar you for life instead. The difference now, in addition to e-mail and instant messenger, is that young girls are more apt to seek an adult to help them problem solve, and I must confess before going any further that, as an assistant principal of a middle school, I hate to see them coming! In complete frustration as a fledgling administra tor, I assigned a group of sixth grade girls an office detention when I could not determine who was mad
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